![\"Monday](\"http:\/\/www.cslewis.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/06\/mondaynew.jpg\")
<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
Dear Friends,<\/p>\n
Last week, I told the story of my friend Shon gently interceding to stop
\nme from delivering a harsh and vindictive response to an injustice
\nbecause she knew that such an action would not represent God’s best for
\nmy life. This is a continuation of that message.<\/p>\n
An old story echoed through my soul in that moment when Shon stopped me.
\nIt is told in 1 Samuel 25.<\/p>\n
David and his guerilla band took refuge in the Wilderness of Paran in
\nthe hill country of southern Judea, late one winter. It was just after
\nSamuel had died. Saul and his army were on the move to hunt them down.<\/p>\n
Paran is a rugged wilderness to this day, laced with many ravines, wadis
\nand caves. In the midst of it was the little hill town of Carmel. This
\nwas the home of Nabal, a wealthy rancher, who possessed a flock of 3,000
\nsheep and 1,000 goats.<\/p>\n
There are many contradictions in the brief story of Nabal. He was a
\nrich, powerful man and a Calebite, a descendant of the brave Caleb, a
\nhero when the children of Israel conquered the Promised Land. Yet,
\nNabal’s name meant “Fool.” Nabal’s wife Abigail is described as “clever
\nand beautiful” , but Nabal is described as “surly and mean”
\nwith words that can translate to “harsh, stubborn and really evil” (v.
\n3).<\/p>\n
Over the course of several weeks, David and his men stepped in several
\ntimes to protect Nabal’s herds and herdsmen from the depredations of the
\nrustlers, bandits, lions, leopards and bears who also found a home in
\nthat desert. These protective interventions were acts of kindness and
\ncourtesy expected in that time and place. Life was hard and dangerous
\nand mutual aid was the basic ethic of community as it continues to be to
\nthis day.<\/p>\n
Jesus endorsed and refined this ethic of love when he said that loving
\nour neighbor as ourselves was a close second to our loving devotion to
\nGod in the priorities of life (Matt 22:37-39). The Apostle Paul
\ndescribed this love of neighbor as a personal responsibility of
\nSpirit-filled, Christ-followers. “My friends, if anyone is detected in a
\ntransgression, you who have received the Spirit should restore such a
\none in a spirit of gentleness. Take care that you yourselves are not
\ntempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and in this way fulfill the law of
\nChrist” (Gal 6:1-2).<\/p>\n
David heard that Nabal was shearing his sheep at his headquarters in the
\ntown of Carmel. This was a time of both hard work and feasting.
\nDavid sent ten of his young men into Carmel with a courteous and
\nrespectful request for some food, anything Nabal could spare for his
\nhungry men in light of their good conduct and assistance to Nabal and
\nhis herdsmen (v. 4-9).<\/p>\n
Nabal was churlish and sarcastic in response. He insulted David and his
\nfamily and compared the well-known vanquisher of Goliath and military
\nhero of Israel to a runaway slave and a vagabond. Then he dismissed
\nDavid’s request out of hand (v. 10-11).<\/p>\n
When David’s men returned and reported the insult, David’s reaction was
\nswift and tough, sounding like something out of a John Wayne western. He
\nstrapped on his sword and ordered, “Every man strap on your sword!” Six
\nhundred battle-hardened soldiers were ready to fight to revenge the
\ninsult on the honor of their leader. David took 400 men with him and set
\nout for Nabal’s homeplace in Carmel. He left 200 men behind to guard
\ntheir equipment (v. 12-13).<\/p>\n
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, one of the young herdsmen told the
\nbeautiful Abigail about the insults Nabal had served up to David’s men.
\nHe told her that David’s men had acted honorably at all times and had
\nprotected Nabal’s livestock and employees from real harm.
\n“You need to do something,” the young man said, “your husband’s insults
\nand abuse may get us all killed, but he’s so obstinate that no one can
\ntalk to him” (v. 14-17).<\/p>\n
The wise and resourceful Abigail didn’t waste her breath on Nabal.
\nShe immediately moved to deal with the problem. She organized a supply
\ntrain with food loaded on donkeys and sent her young male servants
\nriding ahead of her to meet David. She followed on a donkey riding down
\nthe mountain trail towards David’s camp. The two groups met on the trail
\n(v. 20).<\/p>\n
David was furious and told her so. “We wasted a lot of effort protecting
\nyour husband’s property in the wilderness and all we received were
\ninsults in return. I don’t have to take this! May God curse me if I
\nhaven’t killed Nabal and every male in his miserable household by
\nmorning” (v. 21-22).<\/p>\n
Abigail calmly proceeded to give a master clinic on effective dispute
\nresolution. She did ten things towards the effective end of the
\nconflict. It is good to study the list for there is much to be learned
\nfrom Abigail.<\/p>\n
First, she didn’t delay in dealing with the problem. She had already
\nmoved quickly to gather the supplies and send them to David. When she
\narrived on the scene the Scripture says, “She hurried and alighted from
\nher donkey” (v. 23a). David had been swift in going on the attack.
\nAbigail was just as swift in moving to head it off.<\/p>\n
There is an old legal maxim that “Justice delayed is justice denied.”
\nThe correlative spiritual principal conveyed by Paul is “do not let the
\nsun go down on your anger” (Eph 4:26). Anger is molten emotion like lava
\nfrom a volcano. When it isn’t dealt with, human nature tends to harden
\ninto resentment. Things like pride, fear, shame and pain often fuel
\nresistance to resolution with the excuse that a cooling-off period will
\nhelp. But cooling-off can harden rather than soften positions. If
\nphysical circumstances permit, an effort to quickly defuse and resolve
\nthe situation is the better wisdom.<\/p>\n
Second, Abigail didn’t posture. She humbled herself “and fell on her
\nface before David, bowing to the ground” (v. 23b). We so often let pride
\nand fear stop us from being conciliatory. Is the healing of hearts and
\nthe avoidance of a bigger dispute the goal or will pride and fear carry
\nthe day? Do we want to keep scoring points or end the contest? The
\ntemptation is to puff ourselves up and seethe in self-righteousness
\nwhether we are right or wrong, but Solomon again offers an alternative:
\n“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Pr
\n15:1).<\/p>\n
Third, Abigail acted in true intercession. People glibly speak of
\nintercessory prayer like it’s lobbing Nerf balls at the problem from a
\nsafe distance. True intercession means the intercessor takes on the
\nidentity of the one for whom intercession is made. When Christ
\ninterceded, he took our place and gave his life to save ours even though
\nwe didn’t deserve such an extravagant gift. Nabal didn’t deserve
\nAbigail’s intercession, but she put her life on the line for her foolish
\nhusband. “Upon me alone, my lord, be the guilt,” she told David (v. 24).<\/p>\n
Fourth, Abigail spoke the unvarnished truth. She offered no excuses and
\ndid not attempt to defend Nabal’s indefensible conduct. She told David
\nthat Nabal’s name was “Fool” and he’d acted like one. She urged David
\nnot to take Nabal seriously. If she had known that David’s messengers
\nhad come to the ranch seeking help, she would have handled things
\ndifferently (v. 25). Patronizing people with real grievances by offering
\nexcuses for what injured them instead of addressing their injuries is a
\nsure-fire way to escalate conflict.<\/p>\n
Fifth, Abigail agreed with David on the key points of his position.
\nShe reminded David that he had always shown restraint in the past even
\nthough he had real enemies that deserved his vengeance including Nabal.
\nShe hoped that David’s enemies would receive the justice they deserved
\n(v. 26). Conceding the good points of the other side often reduces the
\ninflammation of anger. How can we argue with someone who agrees with us?<\/p>\n
Sixth, Abigail showed good faith by offering redress. She offered the
\npresent of the food she had brought to David and the young men who had
\nbeen insulted. Talk is cheap, but backing words with costly action makes
\na real contribution towards resolution (v. 27)<\/p>\n
Seventh, Abigail asked for forgiveness for what Nabal had done to
\nviolate David’s dignity and honor. Nabal was solely responsible for the
\ninjury and should have been the one asking for forgiveness, but Abigail
\nstood in for Nabal in true intercession when she sought David’s
\nforgiveness. Technicalities should never stand between us and doing the
\nright thing (v. 28a)<\/p>\n
Eighth, Abigail appealed to David’s relationship with the Lord. She said
\nthe Lord would ensure David’s future because David was doing the right
\nthing for the right reasons in fighting the Lord’s battles. Her deftly
\ndrawn implication was that David could reliably trust God to take care
\nof David and everything that concerned him because David’s fate was
\ninextricably tied to God’s goodness (v. 28b-29).<\/p>\n
Ninth, Abigail showed her faith in the Lord’s plans for David’s life and
\ncalling. She stated unequivocally that the Lord would confirm David as
\n“prince over Israel” (v. 30). Abigail believed that God’s best for
\nIsrael would be God’s best for David. She affirmed David in his higher
\ncalling.<\/p>\n
Tenth, Abigail appealed to David’s conscience and reputation. She
\nbelieved that David was going to succeed in fulfilling his anointing as
\nking over Israel. When that happened, David should have no dark stories
\nof personal vengeance and bloodshed in his past and on his conscience
\n(v. 31a). She cautioned David that how he reached the throne was as
\nimportant as getting there. David needed to be a legitimate force for
\ngood and not simply a force. Like my friend Shon did for me that day on
\nthe sidewalk, Abigail expressed her desire for David’s best. She wanted
\nand expected more for him and from him than he was expecting of himself.<\/p>\n
All Abigail asked in return was that David remember her and their talk
\nafter the Lord gave him victory (v.31b).<\/p>\n
David was overwhelmed. He thanked God for sending Abigail to him. He
\nthanked God for Abigail’s good sense and kindness in keeping David from
\ntaking things into his own hands and shedding blood in anger instead of
\ntrusting God. He thanked God that he hadn’t hurt Abigail by violence
\nagainst her household (v.32-33).<\/p>\n
David told Abigail to “Go in peace.” He had heard what she had to say
\nand agreed with her (v. 35). The crisis was over and bloodshed was
\naverted.<\/p>\n
Abigail returned home where Nabal was hosting a huge drunken feast.
\nShe waited until he sobered up the next morning and then told him what
\nhad happened. Nabal’s stupid obstinacy had almost cost him everything
\nincluding his life. Nabal had a stroke and collapsed into a coma after
\nshe finished telling him the news. He died ten days later (v. 36-38).<\/p>\n
It is an amazing story because the grace in it is amazing. Throughout
\nhistory, in every place and time, God has had his witnesses of good
\nsense and courage who offer up themselves as intercessors in faith that
\nGod’s love exceeds anything we can ask or think of in the way of
\njustice. Because we are truly loved, we are not bound to having to grab
\nwhat we can get in the here and now including justice.<\/p>\n
Eternity is the large home of our generous and capable God and there is
\nplenty of room. Having covered our debts with his life, Jesus is in
\nheaven now preparing a place for us and he will return to take us there
\n(John 14:1-3).<\/p>\n
Shon and I had spent many hours discussing the dimensions and
\nimplications of our heavenly Father’s love for us. I first initiated
\nthose conversations with her, but when she stepped in front of me she
\nwas acting on what she’d learned from me.<\/p>\n
Shon set aside her own desire for vindication and told me “Don’t do that
\nbecause it wouldn’t be what is best for you.” Her intercession rebuked
\nme with the fierce tenderness of grace unleashed. The pupil now
\nsurpassed the teacher.<\/p>\n
Years later, this past week in fact, news of a hurtful injustice to
\nfriends and colleagues was brought to me and I told my team, “Strap on
\nyour swords,” and I did so myself. As we moved towards the
\nconfrontation, I remembered the good sense of Abigail and of Shon.
\nThese women spoke to me out of memory with God-breathed love that said
\njust because you can join battle and force justice does not mean it is
\nthe best or right thing for you to do.<\/p>\n
It is the ministry of God’s grace to use the powerless to humble the
\npowerful. There are no exceptions to this truth as David observed in
\nPsalm 25:9-10– .<\/p>\n
He leads the humble in what is right,
\nand teaches the humble his way.
\nAll the paths of the Lord are
\nsteadfast love and faithfulness,
\nfor those who keep his covenant,
\nand his decrees.<\/p>\n
May I always seek the Lord’s best as my best. May you do the same.<\/p>\n
“O taste and see that the Lord is good. Happy are those who take refuge in him” (Ps 34:8).<\/p>\n
Under the mercy of Christ,<\/p>\n
Kent<\/p>\n
\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2013<\/p>\n
Please note that the content and viewpoints of Mr. Hansen are his own and are not necessarily those of the C.S. Lewis Foundation. We have not edited his writing in any substantial way and have permission from him to post his content.<\/em><\/p>\n \u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2014\u2013<\/p>\n![\"Kent](\"http:\/\/www.cslewis.org\/blog\/images\/kent-hansen.jpg\")
Kent Hansen is a Christian attorney, author and speaker. He practices corporate law and is the managing attorney of the firm of Clayson, Mann, Yaeger & Hansen in Corona, California. Kent also serves as the general counsel of Loma Linda University and Medical Center in Loma Linda, California.<\/p>\n